In this “How to Feel Amazing” series, I’ve been sharing tips and tools that I’ve learned through my education and life. Today’s tip is brought to you by the guy who broke into my building and knocked on my door!
It was a Monday night about 730-ish at night. I had come home from an aerial class and as I turned the hallway to go down where my door to my apartment was I heard this grunting noise like someone was struggling.
Now let me pause here to explain that my apt is on the second floor. Right underneath of that is the door to get into the building. This door is essentially a gate, it’s not a solid door.
The door to my apartment is in a little hallway by itself and at the end of that is a railing… which is directly above the door below, which is more like a gate. Above the door, there are about 2 feet of concrete space between the door and my floor, which has the railing on it.
Ok, hopefully, that paints the picture for you…
I am turning the corner to go to my apartment and I hear this grunting, and the next thing I see is this guy pulling himself up over the railing.
Side-note, I’m an Aerialist and I can climb things but this was pretty impressive since there is a decent gap in between the door and the railing for him to grab onto.
As he climbed over the railing and he saw me we both looked shocked at one another.
I was speechless which, if you know me, takes a lot for that to happen to me.
He then says to me “um, I’m looking for my friend, I don’t know if you know her?”
He’s a bit frenetic in his energy…and I’m still stupefied.
Somehow it ends up that I’m now standing at my door and he’s in the main hallway.
I have no idea why but I said to him “you need to be careful.”
He replied, “I know, I’m looking for my friend.”
Again, have no idea why I said this but I think I said: “you need to be careful, I don’t care about you falling over the railing, you don’t belong here, you need to leave.”
He then said, “I know, I’m sorry, I’m looking for my friend. God bless, God bless” and then ran down the hall.
I came into my apartment, lock the door went out on my balcony to see if there was something visibly broken into.
There were girls two floors up standing on their balcony and they asked if I just saw what happened. I told them that the guy came in my hallway. They said that they have a video of him climbing over the gate to get in the parking lot.
We agreed to both call the cops and the safety police for the apartment complex.
While I was waiting for the safety police to pick up the phone, I hear a knock on my door.
I looked into the peep-hole and it was THE guy.
Of course, I didn’t open the door, and, a minute or so later he knocked again.
At this point, I’m really freaked out so I text one of my guy friends who lives down the street and asked if he could come down to my place.
When my friend got down to my building he ran into the guy and talked with him briefly, I’m not totally sure what he said, I know it was something about the guy looking for a friend. When my friend came into my place he said to me “he’s a little guy, he can’t hurt you.”
I explained to him that it was still really scary and as a girl, we feel unsafe at least once a day every day and I needed him to appreciate and understand that.
I asked him to walk with me to talk to the girls on the 4th floor, which he did.
When we got up to their door I knocked and then the fire alarm went off…
My friend said he was going to leave because he didn’t like the noise of the alarm and I went into the girls’ apartment.
We talked about whether or not we should leave the building because, what if this crazy guy was just trying to get everybody into one place (this day and age, anything is possible!)???
My friend texted me and told me that when he walked out of the building he talk to one of the cops, pointed the guy out to them telling them that he climbed the fence into the building and he thinks he pulled the fire alarm.
We looked outside and saw the fire truck and cops in there so we decided to go outside.
When we got outside, we talked to the police gave them all the information that we had and, once the fire alarm stopped, we were allowed back into the building.
I have no idea if they arrested the guy for at least trespassing….and, haven’t heard anything from the cops or from my apartment complex.
So, here’s the lesson in all this. We can be going along in our lives just doing our thing and then Bam! we get hit with this voice intruding our head that tells us that “we’re not good enough or not smart enough we don’t deserve something etc…”
To us, that voice appears very loud and very dangerous.
When it’s someone breaking into our home, we close and lock the door and don’t let that person in.
But…when it comes to the negative voices in our head, most people tend to open the door and welcome it in with no questions asked.
For most of us, as crazy as it seems, believing these voices feels safer than shutting the door on them… because we’ve believed them for so long.
To experience life without those voices seems unnatural…
Which, I totally get. I have plenty of those voices that I’m working through.
The reality is, they’re just voices. Just like I had the opportunity to not open the door when this crazy guy knocked, we have the same choice when it comes to the thoughts in our mind.
And, when that crazy guy knocked on my door, I had to reach out and ask for help. I could have gone it alone, but my nervous system was on such high alert that I reached out to someone I knew would help me feel safe and I allowed him to help me.
In order to experience feeling amazing in life, we have to be selective about who and what we let into our headspace. We may have people and things try to bust into our space but it’s our responsibility to “close the door” on the thoughts, people and things that don’t allow us to feel amazing.
There is no one else that can determine the thoughts in our head or the quality of our lives outside of ourselves.
I hope this crazy story will give you a good visual the next time you have a thought come in your head that you may not be wanting and you will make a decision to “close the door” on any thought or belief that doesn’t allow you to feel amazing.
On my next video, we’ll start to dive into how to release the emotions that are trapped in the nervous system that is keeping us in cycles of self-sabotage and doubt.
Until then, I’ll leave you with today’s tip:
Today’s Tip: Notice what thoughts you are allowing into your headspace. Are they ones that actually allow you to feel amazing or ones that rob you of your joy?